You know the answer to that then. [gently, encouraging.] Disseminate the information slowly, in small groups. Only those you trust to be level-headed, whose loyalty is assured not to be with the city.
Whatever it is you know, you don't have to bear it alone.
[his face feels frozen. It takes conscious effort to remember to breathe again, to control the individual musculature of his features. To close his mouth, to nod. To slide his hand back across the table. To fold his hands in his lap.
'Not as level-headed as you pretend.'
She doesn't trust him.
Why would she mention it to me in the first place? ...Do I really seem so irrational? So useless?
It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. She doesn't trust him.
Something closes behind Uryuu's eyes, and the rest of him follows suit slowly, like a bolt sliding into a lock. Practiced, controlled, empty. She might recognize the look - he learned it from Ryuuken.]
You'll do what you feel is right, of course, Masaki-san.
[She hurt him. She knows that look. She recalls it so well that she almost calls him by another name.]
But I'll tell you one thing. Never go to re-education. It will compromise you much more quickly then slowly over time.
[It's not much. A bone, and she feels...she doesn't know what she feels. She doesn't even know if she trusts herself right now. Too unsure of who to trust. Too scared. Is this the way to treat family?
[he nods again, standing. He'll remember that information. Can't think on it for now, but later - later, when his chest doesn't feel as tight or his limbs as cold, he'll turn it over in his head and think about what she meant by that.
For now, he just pauses at her side and puts a hand over one of hers, hesitant and light.]
You've accomplished a lot already, to know anything more than what we're being fed. Whatever it is that needs to be done... I believe you can do it. [he rubs the side of her hand with his thumb (Ah, she has some of the same callouses I do), then withdraws.] You can come to me if you have any more questions about Aizen Sousuke.
...Thank you again for the tea.
[one last respectful nod, and he'll show himself out.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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I'll keep that in mind. Thank you, Uryuu-san. Actually...speaking of things at face value...
[She takes in a deep breath.]
I've been keeping some things secret from you and from the rest of Ariel.
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...What sort of things?
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[She offers a small smile.]
It's not as if I could tell everyone. There's a lot of people who'd react violently even to the most...general information.
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Whatever it is you know, you don't have to bear it alone.
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[She smiles gently.]
You know if I did that, I couldn't include you by the group. You're not loyal to the city. But.
[She shakes her head a little.]
I care for you dearly Uryuu-san, but you're not as level-head as you pretend.
no subject
[his face feels frozen. It takes conscious effort to remember to breathe again, to control the individual musculature of his features. To close his mouth, to nod. To slide his hand back across the table. To fold his hands in his lap.
'Not as level-headed as you pretend.'
She doesn't trust him.
Why would she mention it to me in the first place? ...Do I really seem so irrational? So useless?
It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. She doesn't trust him.
Something closes behind Uryuu's eyes, and the rest of him follows suit slowly, like a bolt sliding into a lock. Practiced, controlled, empty. She might recognize the look - he learned it from Ryuuken.]
You'll do what you feel is right, of course, Masaki-san.
no subject
[She hurt him. She knows that look. She recalls it so well that she almost calls him by another name.]
But I'll tell you one thing. Never go to re-education. It will compromise you much more quickly then slowly over time.
[It's not much. A bone, and she feels...she doesn't know what she feels. She doesn't even know if she trusts herself right now. Too unsure of who to trust. Too scared. Is this the way to treat family?
No. It makes her feel sick.]
no subject
For now, he just pauses at her side and puts a hand over one of hers, hesitant and light.]
You've accomplished a lot already, to know anything more than what we're being fed. Whatever it is that needs to be done... I believe you can do it. [he rubs the side of her hand with his thumb (Ah, she has some of the same callouses I do), then withdraws.] You can come to me if you have any more questions about Aizen Sousuke.
...Thank you again for the tea.
[one last respectful nod, and he'll show himself out.]
no subject
[She stays at her kitchen table a little while longer, waiting to feel him out of ear shot, before she gets up.
She wonders if this is what Urahara felt like sometimes.
But she doesn't think he went to his bedroom to cry out of guilt. Not from being heart sore either.
That is why she mays sure her door is locked, and a pillow is pressed against her face as she cries herself out. Don't believe in her. Don't.]